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YOU’RE A FAILURE
by Lean - 28 May, 2021
It’s already the first day of February, can you believe it? A month filled with resolutions and goal-setting.
I love hearing about people’s goals and resolutions! It shows a drive to make improvements, to become a better version of themselves from last year.
This past month, I’m sure you’ve seen more people at the gym. That’s always a tell-tale sign of some new-year-new-me resolutions! I’m sure at some point in time you’ve made one of the resolutions below (or all of them):
“I’m going to start working out.”
“I’m going to eat healthier this year.”
“I’m going to get that promotion.”
“I’m going to spend more time with family.”
And, like clockwork, we see the same thing happening every year, usually when February or March rolls around… people fall off their resolution wagons.
WHYYY? Why is it that every year, we always FAIL at our resolutions? 😤 It can get very frustrating, demotivating and disappointing.
Wanna know what I think the worst thing is though?
It’s not that we fail at our resolutions.
It’s that we think we can’t.
You. Will. Fail.
“WHAT ARE YOU SAYING LILLY! Are you saying I should just accept that i’m GOING to fail? 😭”
Short Answer: Of course not!
Long Answer: Here’s the thing... life is not linear. You can’t treat it like a 500m sprint, where there is only 1 winner, and many other losers.
When we set resolutions, we often give ZERO room for failure.
But failure is almost always inevitable. And it’s not our fault! I think it’s a major flaw in this tradition we have of setting resolutions. Every time a new year rolls around, we are UNREASONABLE with our goals! We make a list of resolutions to take on -too many!-, to be completed within a period of time -too short!-.
If you want to make lasting changes, you have to be in it for the long run. It’s not about the big changes that lead to big results. It’s about the small things we take into action everyday. Quoting a FANTASTIC AUTHOR THAT ALL OF YOU SHOULD FOLLOW NOWWWW:
And yes, YOU WILL FAIL. Drill that into your head! We are TERRIFIED of failure, when we shouldn’t be! Choose to learn from them, instead of letting them overwhelm and define you.
‘YOU FAILED’ > Does not make you a failure, any more than…‘YOU SNEEZED’ > Makes you a sneezer.(You get the point)
TRY THIS WITH ME!
Being in the fitness industry, where progress is often only recognised when immediate results can be seen 👀, I’m trying to shift my own mindset when it comes to setting resolutions. Instead of focusing on my big goals, this year I’ll be focusing on building my everyday habits, on building a system that will slowly but very surely inch me closer to these goals.
My habit changes for the next 30 days include:
- A plant-based diet
- Waking every day before 8am
- Making sure I get at least 8 hours sleep each night
- Upload a YouTube video every day
But 30 Days just isn't long enough to create a new habit... Is it?
Research shows that 90 Days is the 'magic' time length to create a new habit. And yes, I do agree that 30 days isn't long enough to make lasting changes.However, for me personally, I like to have a trial period. After all, the positive idea of a new habit may not live up to its reality once implemented. For me, I like to test new habits across a 30 day window, almost like a little trial, and if it's something I want to continue thereafter, great, if not, I'll try something else.
I'm listing down below 5 things to keep in mind when building effective daily habit systems.
1. Tackle ONE habit at a time
Changing a lot of things at once is crazy talk! I introduced my habits above one by one. It's also important to note that choosing complimentary habits i.e. sleeping for 8 hours & waking up everyday at 8am will make the transition into new habits much smoother.
2. Crawl before you walk
Never worked out and suddenly you want to run 10km everyday? DO ❌ NOT ❌ DO ❌ THIS ❌
Don't underestimate the value of starting small, and building up as you go along.
It’s one of the reasons I love sharing my 5-minute workouts and even 3-minute workouts with all of you (check it out, it’s FREE!). Even doing just 3-minutes everyday is enough to form a habit, which then can be built up as you go along.
And when you're ready to take your fitness habits to the next level, check out my LEAN guides (the LEAN Video Guide is still on sale!). I’ll be playing your virtual 1:1 PT on these guides, which is progressive so you can keep on challenging yourself. This is for those who want a higher intensity of workouts, and are committed to upping their fitness a notch 💪.
3. Talk about it!
Tell your friends, family, colleagues. They will support you and keep you accountable.
If you want the BEST accountability group around, join my private Lean With Lilly Facebook group. You will honestly not find a more kind and encouraging group of women 💖. Many members share their goals and progress and receive awesome support from each other!
4. Write it all down
Get a journal / spreadsheet / chart to track your progress. This will keep your habits concrete in your mind, and it’s important to note the small wins along the way!
5. The 2-Day Rule
Now, I’m fully aware that sh** happens (excuse my French) and perhaps, sometimes you may not be able to tick off all of these habits, every day as planned. In which case, I put into place the 2-day rule strategy that I’ve learnt from listening to James Clear’s audio book, Atomic Habits.
Try not miss ticking off a habit for 2 days in a row. So if I struggle to wake up before 8am one morning because I’ve just haven’t had enough sleep, I will be sure to get an early night the next night to get back on track, and wake up before 8am the following day.
If you stumble along the way, don’t beat yourself up and go back to your old habits. You’re better than that! Revisit past failures to see what you could’ve done better… and then leave them in the past.
I hope you’ve gotten some good insight out of reading this! We are all trying to figure out this journey called LIFE, and it’s important to be gracious and grateful, especially towards our own selves ❤️
Shoot me any questions or thoughts you have in our private Facebook group, and I’m always more than happy to chat! We’ve got this! #LetsDoThis